Waitress

Waitress. This was a request by Margo from a few weeks ago. Then she never wanted to watch it, so I gave up and checked it out. What did I expect coming in? A little movie where Keri Russell gets to show her stuff, some cheesiness, just a cute little indie flick.

Ok, so we're in a diner. Somewhere in the south, Mississippi it seems. Keri Russell bakes pies. Lots of pies. And daydreams. She is stuck in a boring job, and a loveless marriage. Her husband(Jeremy Sisto) is an angry, abusive(verbally, emotionally, then physically), and extremely needy man. Jenna(Russell)'s coworkers are inane but good hearted, and her main customer is an enigmatic old man who seems to be superfluous to the plot.

Jenna finds herself pregnant and her new doctor is Dr. Pommiter (Nathan Fillion from Firefly). It has taken me a long time to get to my main point. This movie is weird. Weird weird weird. People are bizarre, relationships are strained and quirky, the movie is filled with strangely named Pies!

It's hard to describe what's so out of the ordinary, but the movie is far from what's expected. I think it didn't do well commercially because people couldn't even nail down what genre it truly belongs in. You'll have to see it to truly appreciate, but one certainly might not like it. Worth viewing IMO, but don't say I didn't warn you.

Morcheeba

One of my favorite bands came to town tonight. Morcheeba at the Somerville Theater. I saw them once before, at the Avalon(which doesn't exist any more) about two years ago I think. Their lead singer wasn't the one I was familiar with, I found out later that they had recently made a change. Last time it was a terrific show, and I had a great time. I had high hopes tonight.

First a quick social commentary. Why is it that 'Doors open at 6:30, main act starts at 7:30' means doors open after 7
opening act starts at 7:45
headliners start around 8:45
Annoying and ridiculous. Why can't the actual time of the show be what is listed on the web site, the tickets and the marquee? Wouldn't that make sense? Does anyone prefer this ridiculously inaccurate time reporting? It's worse than Microsoft time estimates on file transfers.

The opening act was awful. Federico Aubele. We thought he was joking. Along with a female companion, he performed strange, unenthusiastic numbers. Both of them seemed bored to tears on stage, counting the minutes until they could get back to sitting on a couch somewhere. Their act features two rattles and a triangle, each used quite sparingly. Terrible terrible terrible. Really, avoid this guy unless you have insomnia.

Far, far after 7:30 Morcheeba enters. This is another singer entirely. And she seems French! It's funny, when she sings their older numbers she has a more British accent. I would guess that this is because she is imitating. The newer the song is, the more her French accent comes out, and when she speaks she has obviously 'traveled all the way from Paris for this tour' as the guitarist confides in us.

The music is catchy and melodic. There is genuine chemistry between the performers, and the music sounds great. Vocals are somewhat de-emphasized, which makes sense considering their turnover, but old songs still sound good. After a nice length set, Morcheeba came back out for a perfectly paced 4 song encore that got everyone on their feet and dancing. People spilled out happy, well done. See them in concert if you can, highly recommended.

The Eye

the Eye. Another movie I wouldn't have watched if not for Jessica Alba. But we all have our reasons for doing things. The film also stars Alessandro Nivola, whose brother I kind of knew in college, and who I think I met once.

The Eye starts out with dark jump cuts filled with something scary. You can't tell exactly what, but there are screams and loud threatening things going on. This isn't what I expected from the movie. Then we get to Alba. Walking around, showing us how capable of a blind person she is. She can cross the street! She knows the doorman! She can smell flowers! Hooray for her. Lame lame lame.

Alba(her character is Syd, she seems to love playing characters with gender ambiguous names) is getting surgery to replace her eyes. Her sister flies into town to support her, keep her company in her time of need. Parker Posey is the sister. I'm normally a big fan of Posey, but she's pretty useless here.

We're supposed to be scared of the glimpses of death bringer thingies, and care that it upsets Alba. She has absolutely no chemistry with Nivola, and the movie completely fails to engage the viewer. Alba doesn't sparkle and acts as poorly as ever. I'd stay away.

Gentlemen Prefer Blondes

Gentlemen Prefer Blondes. The latest installment of the movie swap stars Marilyn Monroe. The lovely miss Monroe was the object of obsession for a period of my friend's life, resulting in her collecting all things Marilyn(posters, magazines, trading cards), including all of her movies. Yes this is a little creepy, but she's a nice girl so we'll let it pass.

Believe it or not this is my first Marilyn movie. Blondes is a musical(loosely) that also stars Jane Russell. The ladies are a musical act(on Broadway?) that is horribly dated. Mugs said they were dancing like 60 year old women. We are also subject to the ya-ya-yammering of Monroe's millionaire sap(fiancee) whom she kept calling daddy(yes, as weird as it sounds).

The women decide to take a cruise to France, without the fiancee. The US Olympic team is on board, however, as well as a number of rich men, young and old. Hi jinx ensue. We are treated to a number of musical numbers, including :
The Oh-so-creepy almost naked(flesh colored short shorts-with sweat stains) male gymnasts tumbling and flexing
The Uber-bizarre human chandelier in the Paris revue
The cool-to-see "Diamonds are a Girls Best Friend" performance that inspired the Material Girl video

Monroe has a constantly breathless way of speaking that I was able to handle for a movie. As I watch more we'll see if that grates on me. She does have quite a stage presence tho, and I'm intrigued by the stories of her nervousness and bouts with all sorts of substances. This is a fun movie, and has some historical significance. It is quite dated though, and a musical(much to Margo's dismay). Make your own decision :)

**Small correction. I have seen Some Like it Hot before, I didn't remember Marilyn was in that.

Breaking News

Breaking News. I have been seriously neglecting my Netflix queue lately, which feels like I'm not getting my moneys worth. I gotta knock a few of these out this week. Mugs worked all day, and I had some time before pool, so I decided to watch the current Chinese movie(I usually have one out, and Margo usually isn't into them so it's good to watch while she's at work). Today's choice is Breaking News. I remember adding it to my queue because I like a lot of the main actors.

The story opens with a robbery, where we establish that the criminals are thoughtful and ever-planning, and our main policeman is persistent and plucky. The criminals get away, in a highly publicized police failure, and pressure is applied to both solve the crime, and make sure it looks good. One of the actors I watched for was Simon Yam, playing Asst. Commissioner Wong but unfortunately his appearance was more of a cameo.
Nick Cheung plays inspector Cheung(original I know) very well, following relentlessly like he was trying out for the next Die Hard movie. He is handsome and charming, and plays well off of Kelly Chen. Chen herself does well as the 'straight man', yelling at Cheung and manipulating the media. Richie Ren impresses as the bad guy who has thought of everything; Robbing, shooting, taking hostages, even showing off his cooking skills. The scenes in the apartment between Ren and Chung are actually touching, and some of the action is cool despite over reliance on the grenade as element of danger.

The beginning of the movie is an astounding 7 minute one shot take. Worth seeing if you have some time and like HK action films, but don't go out of you way to see it.

John Adams

John Adams. Here is a new mini-series from HBO. Good. Produced by Tom Hanks? You've got me. I'm not a huge fan of Paul Giamatti, but maybe he'll surprise me. I'm interested in American history in general, and this series seems to have a cast of good actors.

We open on the night of the Boston Massacre. Giamatti is his normal overacting-in-strange-times self, making it difficult to tell what Adams is supposed to be feeling. A very poor job is done of conveying the horror of the massacre, or the effect it had on the locals. Another problem is that the British soldiers are so horribly weird looking, it really distracts. It honestly looks like they walked around the streets for a couple of hours, and grabbed the strangest people they could find. Then chose the worst actor among them to be the commander.

Then they completely skip the Boston Tea Party! This could have been the most fun scene to watch in the entire series. Give a good director that scene to work with, the budget of HBO and a little artistic license, what could they come up with? Oh, a mention that the tea party happened. Awesome.

The Continental congress is more boring to watch than C-SPAN, and Margo almost choked on her beverage the first time we saw the fake nose on the George Washington(David Morse).
Laura Linney brings very little to the table, and there has to be a better way to handle the wig issue. Two episodes were more than enough, I am miles from impressed. At least it shows that HBO can still make mistakes. If I manage to struggle through any more episodes when they come out I'll try to write another update, but so far, I would recommend that you stay away.

Into the Wild.

Into the Wild. Hmm ... I have a lot of thoughts about this movie, I'm just not sure how to express all of them. Coming in I wasn't sure exactly what to expect. I think I like Emile Hirsch, and the subject matter sounded interesting. I didn't read the book, I don't know anything about the book, I don't think I even knew this was a true story. Mugs is much more in touch with the literary world than me, she seemed to know a lot about it. I read my share, just less mainstream stuff, and pretty much no non-fiction.

I have some perturbed things to say about the movie, so let me start with this : It was beautifully shot. The scenery was just amazing. It made me wish(a bit) I had seen it in a theater. Or on an HD DVD. Mountains, rivers, the Grand Canyon. Roads, deserts, even the people were really filmed well. It was almost like watching a National Geographic special.

As for the subject matter... Hmm... I really really disliked the protagonist Alex(played by Hirsch). I just found him so terribly hypocritical and annoying. He was all about preaching absolutes(which he didn't adhere to) when life isn't black and white. Last night Margo was trying to help me put a finger on just what I hated about him so much. She realized that I hate fundamentalism. This is true. Religions, statements, beliefs in general. I don't like a 'black and white' view of the world. People have asked me to get more into this, but I don't want to rant, and I don't want to make more people upset than normal. We can get more into it one-on-one if you'd like, I'm around :)

Overall, the movie is interesting, and visually terribly engrossing. Most people won't have the same problems I did with it, so I can recommend it. I felt unsatisfied, but check it out for yourself. It's at least worth seeing so you can talk about it :)

**Spoiler alert**
I was kind of happy he died at the end. It feels like the inevitable ending to throwing away all of the rest of the world. And even though it seems like it wasn't his intent to die out there, it must have been one of the possibilities as he entered his 'great Alaskan adventure'.

The Constant Gardener.

The Constant Gardener. I saw this movie a couple of years ago, and didn't really like it. A friend recently recommended it to me, and I couldn't for the life of me remember why. I just remembered it being very long, and unsatisfying.

About 2 minutes into the movie, I remembered. It is starring two of my least favorite actors. Rachel Weisz, and Ralph Fiennes. Weisz has this brimming overbearingness that comes through in most of her roles. I know some people find this charming, but it drives me a bit mad. I also find her terribly unattractive. I have fostered a dislike for Rafe(I'm writing the pretentious crap phonetically) ever since I saw The English Patient in Spanish. Every role I've seen him in (Except Valdemort) has been of a simpering ninny. Just spineless uselessness. I am very much looking forward to seeing In Bruges, maybe he'll turn things around.

The good news is that they are both well cast in Gardener. Weisz, the bulldozer do-what-you-think-is-best-everyone-else-be-damned activist who drives everyone nuts and hurts everyone who cares for her. Fiennes the rare male 'wet blanket' who underwhelms and acts completely helpless for most of the very long two hours.

The scenery is amazing. Craters, trees, lakes, rivers, the landscapes are breathtaking. We see the vibrant colors and beautiful nature from the perspective of planes, cars, and walking people. Aside from the mains, the people are terrific. Showing a genuine, wholehearted friendliness and exuberance, you can't help smiling at the adorable children. We also see the terrible side of a country with an unstable government. Corruption, graft, constant fear for ones safety, being preyed upon by every outside force and native power possible.

There is a legitimate political agenda in the movie, not bothering to hide. It could have been done well, but seems thin and hacky. Strange indigence and hinted threats only work for so long. If we could combine an effective message with the scenery and take just that, I may have really liked the movie. The main players however, and the poor social commentary doom it for me. View at your own risk.

Awake

Awake. Came in from Netflix last week, I just never got around to watching it. A friend wants to borrow the DVD, so why not knock it off while I have some free time. Got home early cause we won our 9-ball match this week!

So who is in this movie? Jessica Alba and Hayden Christenson. This does not make me hopeful. As much as I love Alba(and Margo can attest, that's a lot) I don't remember her ever being in a movie that made me say "that was a good movie". Except for ... nope, never a good movie. Oh wait, Sin City. That was a good movie, but her part was pretty inconsequential for me.
Hayden Christenson however, finally found a part written for him.
"You're under general anesthetic. You can't move. ACTION!" As much as it seemed like he thought that was his role in the Star Wars movies, it wasn't. He was also pretty wooden in Jumper, so I am glad he's lying down.

Terrance Howard. Now there's an actor. He excels in every role he's in, and he seems to be making a daily, non SAG rate. I don't understand why that's not a story, and some day I'll find out more about it. Shooter McGavin and the goofy guy from Short Circuit are doctors, and playing serious roles.

Christenson needs a heart transplant, and he wants his friend(Howard) to perform the surgery.
The process begins, but he retains consciousness without the ability to do anything except feel pain and have out of body experiences. This allows him, and the viewer, to see all of the twists and turns that take place in this anything-but-ordinary procedure.

Awake is well paced, interesting, and just a good movie. I was pleasantly surprised throughout, as all of the actors seem well casted, and the dialogue was effective. I would recommend it for almost anyone, check it out.

The Squid and the Whale.

The Squid and the Whale. Well, it's been a few days and I have another movie from my movie swap buddy. Swap 1, we each gave a movie starring an Audrey. Swap two, was heavy movies. No, we don't discuss beforehand. I gave her One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest. Which is a terrific movie, especially if you've read the book(luckily she has). I was given Squid, so here we go.

I remember seeing posters for this when it came to the Kendall theater. I wanted to see it, but it never seemed the right time. You kind of have to be in a certain mood to see a movie that will probably make you upset. The good news is that I've never experienced a divorce first or second hand so I have some buffer from the emotions.

We open on the final stages of a broken marriage. Parents fighting, lying to each other. Making the children take sides on issues, blaming each other for problems. The children each seem to be closer to one parent, the younger(Frank) seeming to be more mature and more interested in keeping everyone happy. A healthy dislike is developed for most of the characters, with William Baldwin(of all people) ending up as probably the most likable character.

Jeff Daniels is terrific as the overbearing, intellectual snob father far past his prime. Can you believe he was one of the stars of Dumb and Dumber? Laura Linney also excels as the mother who means well but just doesn't seem to understand how to handle relationships. Anna Paquin effectively portrays the minx creating friction between Father and older son.

As I said, I'm pretty far removed from family stresses of this kind, so I can look at it objectively. I enjoyed the film, and it was written, casted and acted very well. If you don't mind some disturbance, and some pretty heavy stuff check it out.

Funny Face

Funny Face. My new friend SLC found out I love movies, so we decided to try a movie swap. I know she loves European things so I lent her Dirty Pretty Things, which is a terrific thrilling drama set in London and starring Audrey Tautou. I was given Funny Face, which looked familiar but I haven't seen it before(and also stars an Audrey).

Funny Face is an amusing little musical starring the aforementioned Audrey Hepburn, and Fred Astaire. We are treated to some classically dated cinematography featuring genuinely good dance numbers and some fun songs. Astaire helped choreograph, and Kay Thompson seems to combine the inspiration for Meryl Streep's character in The Devil Wears Prada and a jovial Lucille Ball.

Astaire starred in Funny Face as a Broadway musical in 1927, 2 years before Hepburn was born. Then he starred in the movie as her love interest in 1957, even though he is 30 years her senior. While there seems to be some real chemistry there, it is a bit creepy. Mugs doesn't like musicals as much as I do, but she liked that I was enjoying it, so everyone ended up happy.

Top Movies.

Good morning huddled masses. Throughout my life, people have often asked me what my favorite films were. Now that I'm a budding Movie Review Professional(I have earned a whopping $0.66 so far), I get the request more often, and I feel a responsibility to share.

So, now for the long awaited list of my favorite movies. Please leave comments about your favorite movies, or any questions you have about my choices. People don't leave many comments, lets get that ball rolling.

1) My favorite movie of all time is the most finely crafted comedy ever made. Credit to credit laughs, memorable catch phrases, jokes applicable to real life. A terrific cast, even a mediocre soundtrack. The breakout role for the highest paid actor in Hollywood. I've seen it over 100 times.
Ace Ventura: Pet Detective.

2) With number two, I change pace. A sentimental favorite, I have loved this movie for a long time. If it doesn't pull your heartstrings at least a little bit you're a horrible robot. Jimmy Stewart being Jimmy Stewart.
Harvey.

3) Number three is another movie that increased American Vernacular. Fun catch phrases, a terrific soundtrack. The best collaboration between two real life friends, and it gave hope to losers everywhere. Plus he made Wayne's head bleed.
Swingers.

4) Next comes the second movie on this list that I can basically watch scene for scene in my head. Viewing with me is either a lot of fun or horribly frustrating, as I laugh before each joke arrives. My favorite scene from the movie is one I misunderstood for about 7 years. I quote it daily, and use a couple of the phrases more often than you know.
Princess Bride.

5) To round out my top 5 (yes I'm stopping at 5 for now. I can do 6-10 another time) I am adding my favorite martial arts film. It's a remake of a classic, starring my favorite martial artist of all time, featuring him beating up approximately everyone that f's with him. I would definitely not kick him out of bed.
Fist of Legend.

The Wire finale.

Another week, another finale of a series I like. This week it's The Wire. And it's done for good. Of course you already know this, but that's right, the Wire is over. The best show ever on television is now finished. As Margo so eloquently put it, "Poor Christopher"... frowny face.

I'll miss the writing, the acting. The characters, the gritty reality. The anticipation of a new episode. It didn't end happily for everyone, but it ended well, with its head help high. I'm getting choked up about this, time to change the subject...

I've been watching a lot of High Stakes Poker on GSN. If you like poker, I highly recommend it. It is a lot of fun. In pool news, my friend Andy and I won our 9-ball match this week after being thoroughly embarrassed last week.

Bridge tomorrow, we'll talk soon :)

Dan in Real Life

Dan in Real Life. I like Steve Carrell. He's funny. The movie had mediocre trailers : not enough to deter this buckaroo. Goodbye drinks with my friend who's leaving town got cancelled, so we decided to give this a shot.

Whoever made this movie, hold out your right hand. Now hold out your left hand. . Bad movie-maker. Bad, bad bad movie maker.

If you haven't gotten the picture, this is a bad movie. Terrible. Awfully written, poorly acted, terribly casted. Even the music was disjointed and distracting. After about 10 minutes Mugs was begging me to turn it off, and it never improved. But I struggled on, for you, faithful reader. I hope you can appreciate my sacrifice.

Let me review a few of the horribly annoying things about the film. Dan(Carrell)'s daughters. Such ridiculous caricatures of teenage brattiness. They were annoying, unrealistic, and frustrating to watch. At one point, the terribly patient and wonderfully nice Margo commented :
"I would punch my stupid kids in the face, then leave them there." I wholeheartedly agree.

Upon pulling Dan over, a police officer says to him "This is gonna cost you." Awesome. In a random dive bar in the middle of coastal Rhode Island, the juke box song played in some weird techno. No one in the bar seems to notice. Very progressive of them. I'm sick of these examples.

Then we get to the casting. Juliette Binoche is a 'hottie' and she is 'smokin'. Reeeeally? Really? There was a time when she was a sex symbol. She is pretty. But come on. She looks terrible in 'DIRL'. Very very far from the bewitching hottie she's supposed to be. The scenes in which she's supposed to make us hot are laughable. Dan goes on a date with Emily Blunt, who is 21 years younger than him. 21 years! And she looks at least that. How are we supposed to take it seriously that he's dating a woman he knew when younger, if he had his first daughter when she was 6. Aargh.

I think I'm done here.

There Will Be Blood

There Will Be Blood. Daniel Day-Lewis is terrific. He might be the best actor of our time. When I first heard of this movie, I wanted to see it. To experience his smoldering intensity as a turn of the century oil tycoon. While I definitely think he deserves the Best Actor he won for his performance, I wasn't super crazy about the movie.

Loosely based on Upton Sinclair's novel Oil, the movie is slow but very interesting. As long as it is, it seems like there were many plot points left out. When I read that Paul Thomas Anderson had trouble reconciling the story, more things made sense. Margo and I both thought this would have been better as a mini-series. Prospecting, drilling, buying, etc ... They could have more fully developed each aspect, and made each time period more clear.

The Paul/Eli dichotomy was unintentionally confusing, they were originally different actors playing the parts. Paul Dano was very good in those roles though. A friend of mine had told me about the "I WILL DRINK YOUR MILKSHAKE" line a couple of weeks ago, so I was waiting and waiting for that to be delivered. I liked Bill Hader's delivery better in the SNL spoof of the scene.

Not a ton to day about the film I guess... Overall, definitely worth watching, but make sure you have time for it.

the Darjeeling Limited

the Darjeeling Limited. I am a big fan of Wes Anderson films, I haven't seen anything of his that I didn't like. I tried to watch this movie Tuesday night. I fell asleep. Ok, bad night. I tried to watch it again last night, we both fell asleep. Yes we started the movie after midnight both times, but this is a bad sign. It's very very slow, and not very attention grabbing. I think by now I've seen most of it, and I've seen very little that's remarkable. I will try to watch it again this weekend or next week. For now, I'm holding off on a full review.

What else have I been up to? Monday night is now bridge night, you can see results in my links on the left. So far Annette and I are 3-0 in three weeks. Last night trivia again. After a tough start, we came back strong, finishing in second place thanks to Norman's knowledge of the final round answers.

Terminator : the Sarah Connor chronicles ended this week. I liked the show, and the conclusion. I just didn't like how it was hyped ahead of time, like there was some huge twist coming. That kind of cheap crap isn't necessary. People were going to watch it anyways, now some are disgruntled. This weekend is the series finale of The Wire. I'm excited to see it, disappointed it's going to end. Oh well, hopefully tonight will be There Will be Blood and homemade pizza. Yum :)

Balls of Fury

Balls of Fury. Ping pong? Not only am I a fan, I'm also a player. Christopher Walken? I got a fevah, and the only prescription is more Walken!! When this first came out, I really wanted to see it. But it didn't seem like a movie you had to see in theaters, nor one that would be ruined by waiting. A lot of people seem to have wanted to see it, but few actually did. Which is a shame. Hopefully Netflix will get some good play out of this gem.

The movie opens with a young ping pong prodigy, the hope of the US in the 1988 Beijing Olympics. The opening was actually a bit like I imagine my chess movie(forthcoming) will start. We have show off skills, and the humor feels a bit familiar, but I couldn't remember from where.

As the movie progresses, I realize the movie is made by the folks who made The State, Reno 911, Wet Hot American Summer, etc. Robert Ben Garant directs, and he really shines. There were laughs throughout, for me, Mugs, even her friend. While the movie had its share of just silly, the humor was off-beat, unpredictable and refreshing.

The lead was Dan Fogler, who I think is famous for improv acting troops. His performance left us asking why he isn't in more movies. Our German antagonist is played terrifically by Thomas Lennon. I've been a big fan of the lovely Maggie Q for a long time, and she does well in the female lead. We have a quick cameo by the always funny Patton Oswalt. Then we have Christopher Walken. I think I'd watch him in a Russian infomercial for diapers. He's captivating, terrific.

The ping pong action itself isn't as good as in, say, Ping Pong(which I highly recommend) but it was well done. Mugs and I both really really liked it, I am most likely going to buy it when I get a chance.